How to chose a marriage partner part 1

We need to know how to make the right choices because there are a lot of young men and young women who are desirous to marry. Most times people get into trouble determining who to marry and a lot of wrong choices can be made in the church. And no how matter Christian you are if you make the wrong choice, you are going to make problems .
“[KJV] Song of Songs 1:16 Behold, thou art fair, my beloved, yea, pleasant: also our bed is green.
[KJV] Song of Songs 1:17 The beams of our house are cedar, and our rafters of fir.
Note the phrase ” Also our beds is green. The whole book of songs of Solomon talks about a lobe relationship between Solomon and a lady the bible described as a shulamite woman who seems to be the sweetheart of Solomon.
At the beginning of this relationship between Solomon and the shulamite woman this is one of the point that was made concerning their relationship they had a green bed. Now having a green bed has nothing to do with the paint or the Polish that was used to make the bed. But it talks about the condition of their relationship. The green bed talks about the freshness, it was not a brown bed,the Green bed is talking about a bed that has not been defiled in other words the relationship between Solomon and the shulamite woman did not begin with a sexual relationship it begun as a friendship between a man and a woman. At the time Solomon married this woman, they have not had sex before and so this bed was also described as Green.
It set the foundation of every relationship between Christians that eventually leads into marriage. For Christians every relationship must begin pure and end pure, for the unbeliever when they get into relationship he does not think of friendship but he first thinks of going to bed. But in the church going to bed with somebody is not the primary reason for a relationship. In the church, people should be able to have relationships grow in it till they marry before they think of going to bed. Unfortunately we leave in a world where that system is not a very popular system because we leave in a world which says that before you buy something you must test the thing to see whether it will work. And so by that logic, people say that before you marry you must test the woman and see whether they will function. Now I agree that they should test before they marry but what kind of of test are they talking about? Is it a test to see whether the person can become pregnant or test to see whether the person is equip as a woman or a equip as a man? That you don’t need to test but you only need to believe. Because God who made the male and the female had made them in that way you don’t need any test to proves God’s work what God has done he has done so what kind of test are we talking about?. Its more a test of character than a test of sex. Is a test to know whether my character suit this character or whether that character suit my character. Now most of the time because people begin on the wrong step they don’t ever get to know each other until they marry, because their minds are preoccupied with one thing and when they meet there is only one agenda and because of that they never get to know each other then they marry and have shocks in their lives. If you take time to do what Solomon did with this woman and have a green bed to begin with it is the basis for a good relationship. Christians are different we see things different from the way the worldly sees things. The world see things on a sulfish man centred view Christians sees things from God perspective what does God says? What is God demanding ?
Songs of Solomon 4:9-10
[KJV] Song of Songs 4:9 Thou hast ravished my heart, my sister, my spouse; thou hast ravished my heart with one of thine eyes, with one chain of thy neck.
[KJV] Song of Songs 4:10 How fair is thy love, my sister, my spouse! how much better is thy love than wine! and the smell of thine ointments than all spices!
Solomon said you have ravished my heart… Who? My sister my spouse in other words before the woman ever became spouse to Solomon she had first become a sister to Solomon. In other words they began a brother sister relationship before it leads to marriage. Most of us that first stage of the relationship is not important to us. Because most of us think that the only time to talk to a woman is to propose to her that you want to marry her. And there are some of us that are playing risky and reckless games, you see somebody you don’t knowyou just admire her once and you don’t even have any relationship with the person the first time you open your mouth is to propose to her that you want to marry her. Marriage develops from friendship, courtship then you we have marriage. Before you ever think of marrying someone there should be a time of friendship and a time of friendship is where there are no strings attached the relationship. Is the time when you know the person just as a friend, and at the time of friendship most at times you may have a lot of people you are friends with because that time is an open time you may have a lot of people you are friends with. If a start a friendship with about 10 peoples you may have three of them who are properbles. Time of friendship is very important because romance disturb focus, if you are romantically with someone you don’t think, you become crazy and blind and so if your relationship start with romance is most likely you will overlook so many things. And because you overlook so many things when you marry you encounter things you didn’t see. But if you start with friendship there you will be able to asses the person without any alterial motive.
To be continued

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